Self-Sabotage
Self-Indulgent
Self-Pity...NO

Gluttonous & Guilty

One Month = 6lb lost
One Week = 6lbs gained

Why?
What does it matter...

Make a Plan
Take Action
Get Moving
Get back to Losing
Put it behind me

Week 30 may as well be Week 1

I'm still here
I haven't given up
I am strong

Self-Reliant
Self-Sufficient

I will persevere!

Week 29 Weigh In ~ Going the wrong way

UGH! 3lb gain this week. I did really well during the known challenges, birthday celebrations etc. Unscheduled night shift and then, probably in the wake of being tired and aggrevated on Monday I started down the slippery slope of bad choices. I ate too much or just plain "bad" things and sadly have not yet broken hold of this compulsion to eat and eat and eat.

It does seem a cycle with me every so many months to have a set back yet other than realizing I'm in one I have yet to figure out how to break free from it - or better yet, avoid it all together.

I guess I have many months and pounds to figure this out so that maybe, just maybe, when I get to maintenance I might not have to struggle to STOP overeating but be able to stop it before it begins.

I'm back to 40lbs lost and I am still proud of myself. I need to get my latest update pictures taken and posted. Definitely will be in a different shirt because I lost the one I had been using on a tube shut when floating a local river yesterday. Yes, I sat in a tube and floated a river for 4-5hrs yesterday and THAT wouldn't have happened 40lbs ago!

Anyone out there have any suggestions on how to stop a binge either before it starts or while in the throws of it?

Week 28 Weigh In

Short post, having friends over for dinner and doubt I'll get on the computer at all tonight so before I leave work I thought I'd let the blog world know, because I know you are anxious to know, that this week I lost another 1.6lbs this week!! Yea. I've been really, really good with food and had one good long walk.

That brings me to a total of 43lbs gone....forever this time!

Now I'm off to slice red potatoes and grill a bunch of chicken. I even made a WW dip and bought one bag of baked scoops. The guys will eat the regular chips as they drink beer. I will enjoy in much moderation as I have been saving up for a splurge this coming Friday. Girlfriends + birthday = time to let loose - - at least a little! :)

Where I've been, where I am, and where I'm going

I was recently trying to better organize my closet and drawers etc when I came across a couple of dresses that inspired this post.

The first dress is one that I bought for my brothers wedding in October of last year. I wore this same dress for our company Christmas party in December and distinctly recall feeling HUGE that night and hating the picture that was taken of all of the people from my department. I wondered what I weighed then and how different the dress would look now that I've lost weight. Well, rather than try to describe for you the difference let's take a look at photographic evidence shall we?

This is the picture taken at our Company Christmas party. I went back and looked at my weight tracker on WW and I weighed around 5lbs less when this was taken than I did at the beginning of the year when I started this particular journey and blog.

This is where I've been:

The next picture was taken today, 27 1/2 weeks into my weightloss journey and around 37lbs less than in the previous picture.

This is where I am:

(I realize the original picture isn't the best but I think you really can see the difference in size of my booty!)

I also saw a dress hanging there, so lonely in my closet, that I wore when we went on a cruise with a large group of friends back in 2006. At that time I was 20lbs from where I think I would be happy as a goal weight. Silly, silly girl. Why did you let yourself get so big again? So I thought that it might be just as worthwhile to see where I am currently in that same dress vs. where I hope to one day be. (again)

This is where I am: (apologies for the girls being so prominently displayed but, well, the dress covered more when there was less to cover! :)

This is where I want to be: (relatively anyway)

*at the time of posting I was unable to find the full length pic of me in this dress. I guess it was taken by someone else. I will have to find it and scan it later today.

Pictures really do say a lot don't they? I am due to take another update picture this week as well and I'm thinking it's time for me to find a new outfit that will continue to show the progress I make from here forward. The current shirt is so large now it just isn't a good choice anymore.

I am hoping these pictures will remind me of where I've been (and never want to go back), of where I am (and have worked hard to get here...again) and of where I'm going...only this time I'm setting up permant residence in Maintenanceville!!

Week 27 ~ Successful Switch

I was very nervous about the shock my body might experience making the switch from low carb back to Weight Watchers. I do know it had an effect on the scale and, well, I guess that's more what I was nervous about. I started back on WW immediately after WI last Wed morning and tried to not just go carb crazy. I have been concentrating on eating more healthfully and trying not just to get in my "healthy 8" but also make certain things even more healthy. I've taken some tips from various bloggers and have added fresh spinach to a few of my smoothies this week. You really can't taste it and it gives you an extra boost of vitamins etc - first thing in the morning that must be a good thing right?


Today I did my first smoothie with kefir rather than yogurt and even opted to try light vanilla soymilk in place of my 1% milk. I may have, for today, done too many changes at once. I didn't care as much for my smoothie this morning as any other but I'm willing to keep trying.


I only walked the two times at the inviation of my friend but ....

....mid post I had an employee call in sick for work and so I had to drop everything and go in and cover. Now, about 12hrs later, I don't know where I was going with that. I do intend to get to working out again I just haven't applied myself to making it happen rather than just think about making it happen.

This week I actually did register a loss despite the shock and am happy to say I'm down another 0.2lbs! I'm glad the switch back to WW was successful.

This next week will be dedicated to getting back into the routine of exercising and trying a few new recipes or changes.

Ch..Ch...Ch...Changes

I switched back to following Weight Watchers first thing Wednesday morning after doing low carb for three weeks.

I have been journaling all of my food and haven't gone over my points. If anything I've had a low point day but it wasn't intentional. I've also struggled with the points juggling on the days I work overnight and end up being up for 24hrs or so.

The best part of my week thus far is that thanks to a good friend I've finally started moving again! I've joined her for nice long walks twice in the last three days. Luckily for me she has a cool iphone with an app for telling us just how far we've walked, how long it took us, average MPH etc. :) After not doing anything for almost a month I've walked almost 9miles in the past few days. My calves are sore and surprisingly my back is tight. Maybe its the inclines? I've kinda missed the soreness of repairing muscles. Is this what was meant by hurts so good? :0)

The scale is up 1 1/2lbs from Wednesdays weigh in and I'm trying hard to convince myself that it is but a temporary thing that what the scale says matters less than the fact that I'm eating right and exercising.

My biggest concern of late is that as I've said, I'm feeling thinner and better and typically when this starts happening is when I allow myself to slide so I'm making a concentrated effort to stay on track.

Week 26 Weigh In

I just can't believe that half the year is gone! Where ever did it go? I am proud to say that I have spent the past 6months losing weight rather than gaining or even maintaining. I have exercised more than I typically would have despite the fact that it is less than I could have or should have. That would be the thing I will work on the most over the last half of the year. Dedicate myself to eating healthier and moving more. I would LOVE to lose as much the second half of the year as I did Jan - Jun!

Speaking of weight loss...I managed to make both of the challenges I have been a part of. Ang at Get fit After 40 challenged us to lose a healthy 5lb/mo over the Summer and Jack Sh*T did his first ever challenge for those who may lose a little more slowly, Lord knows I've had my low loss, no loss weeks. Despite gaining 5lbs over the first part of June (vacation) I was able to get rid of that wt and an additional 5.4lbs this month! This week the scale was down 2.8lbs. Wow. That is truly wonderful.

I also am back on Weight Watchers as of this morning. I really missed certain carbs and just don't think I could have continued on that for much longer. It may be a good switch once in a great while to get the scale moving again. I have always said you need to mix it up and keep your body guessing! ;)

I also will be slowly introducing the carbs back into my diet as opposed to going full stop today. You see, I normally have oatmeal or cereal for breakfast and snacks such as 100cal popcorn, Fiber One bar etc. The lunches and dinners were not really that diffferent. Lean protein and veggies (I'll just stick to the lower carb veggies for awhile) and the low fat/fat free versions of things like cheese and sourcream.

I'm afraid that switching back to WW and re-introducing myself to My Fitness Coach will put enough of a shock on my system that I probably won't see much/if any loss this week. Remind me of that when I'm bummed next Wed ok?

I appreciate all of your kind words on my last post. I still am not sure where I will go with that. Isn't the first step recognizing/admitting you have a problem?

I am still here. I am feeling thinner, feeling better and hope to start feeling stronger. I find motivation in many places these days: in the way I feel, that I am not alone in this journey, that I am setting an example for my kids and that I am making the kind of changes that will benefit me healthwise and my family for many many years to come.

Of course, its easier to be motivated when the scale is moving down like you want so where do you find motivation both in success' and more importantly when you are not seeing the scale move as you would like?